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Friday, May 27, 2016

Good Friends


It is summer.  I am grateful for the slow start to the summer season with the rain and canceled plans. The weeks leading up to the coveted break was anything but slow. It was frantic, hurried, hard, sad and emotionally draining.

So because it is summer I have lots of time to reflect, recharge and reinvent myself. (In between planning for next year's school year, tech seminars, NETFLIX and enjoying my new pool of course!)

Remember how I said it was a sad few weeks; well let me say that when there is pain and hurt you find your village waiting for you...  like that lighthouse showing you the way.

They send you a love note in the middle of the night; they meet you where you are to just say... hey it is okay! They make you laugh even when you don't want to, they make you take your vitamins, unplug your phone and make sure you have showered. Essentials.

It seems so elementary- but being a good friend is that. Simple. Easy breezy.

All the feels. 

I love sappy and sweet- I do. But I know it isn't always that way... sometimes we have all the feelings with our friends. And maybe just maybe we want to punch them in the throat ( as an act of love of course) but ultimately, friends... true, real friends... those are the ones that make this "adulting" thing manageable.

As I caught up on the phone with a dear friend recently; we laughed, listened, encouraged and loved each other in the short 13 minutes we had. It wasn't elaborate; it wasn't glamorous but in those moments she knew I loved her and was her biggest fan.

No one should feel alone; connection is key in this plugged in world we live in...so make it count. So what is a true friend?

This is a list I came up with the little help from a friend.

How to Be a Good Friend

1. Listen to them...don't interrupt, really listen.
2. Be intentional about spending quality time time together
3. Give them space to explore things on their own
4. Laugh with them and at them... because come on!
5. Show up! That is all!
6. Watch movies together... stupid ones, serious ones, let them pick and make fun of you if you DON'T GET IT
7. Be loyal
8.  Get pedicures together... let them get the color they choose without comment. okay you can comment- but don't think it will matter!
9. Take their side- unless they're being ridiculous in which case you have to tell them.
10. Respect your differences- hell, welcome it!
11. Know their favorite drink...THIS IS A MUST.
12. Ask them what scares them... and then comfort them,
13.Try new things together and don't be afraid to fail.
14. Be their biggest cheerleader and their biggest fan, but also know when to tell them to hang it up.
15. Love them hard.

I am not the perfect friend - this list isn't meant to make you pace and get nervous; it just is. This is what being a true, honest friend looks like for me. It is what I was shown selflessly by people who have loved me when it wasn't always easy... and I hope I can reflect this to my village everyday.



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