Dreams Matter

Contemplate the minds of our little ones. They are so fragile,  yet strong and I take the job of teaching them very seriously. I am passionate and enthusiastic about giving them the tools to be creative and resourceful to think on their own. This past week, when I did a lesson on Martin Luther King Jr. and encouraged them to write their own I have a dream speech, I was. Blown. Away.  

I Have a Dream

By a 9 year old world changer 

I Have a Dream

That I can dance on Broadway 

That my family can be with me all my life 

That my friends grow up to be strong 

Oh I have a dream...

That all children can get a good education

That grown ups don't have to work too hard 

That people will start to make better decisions

Oh, I have a dream...

That people will find that God is with them 

That people will learn to read and write correctly

That there will be grace in our future 

Say what?? This is straight from the mouths of babes...no prompting. No start up... Just this 3rd grader. Rocking the world. Wanting her world to be full of God and Peace and Grace. Equality. Love. 

And this wasn't the only one like it. Their papers were filled with awesome dreams. Big dreams. Brave dreams.

There were dreams of healthy families, cures for "canser" and for people to take care of their dogs. There were dreams of being soccer players, forgiveness, fairness and for God's will to be done  and (wait for it) for our country to be safe and protected. 

I couldn't stand it.  I was punched in the gut by each of them. These children get it. The love thing. We as adults are still confused by it all. Why is that???

On this day, the day we celebrate Martin Luther King Jr. and his dreams - my message is that every dream matters.

Continue to be brave little dreamers. Your dreams matter.  

Crazy Girl vs. Action Girl

Let me introduce you to Crazy Girl and Action Girl. They are two antagonists living in the same body. But it makes for some good fun and she is okay with being the butt of many of jokes! She is also a good sport. On Sunday, this landed in my inbox from my crazy/action friend. After you read this you will know that she is totally crazy. And the best part about it is she knows it, owns it and admits it. We call that just owning your s#%*!  

"I may have bitten off more than I can chew. 

I've decided to learn how to cook healthy, organize my kitchen and maybe lose some weight at the same time.

I'm not asking for advice- remember last week when I said I don't want to hear it? I'm not even looking for pity or a side-eye glance. 

I'm just stating the fact that there are changes that need to made, I want to accomplish them and....

I recognize I'm a crazy head.

     Just thought you should know.

I believe that winter is a time of renewal, not spring. By the time spring rolls around I want to be frolicking outside, with all the springtime creatures. (I live in a forest but really I'd be hanging out in my hammock with a good book.)

When winter comes, and I'm stuck inside, I look around and decide ' I need to cook more' or 'this cabinet is appalling! I can't find anything'. I'm not sure why this hits me in winter. It might be partly because of New Year's resolutions but also cause it's hard to function when you're staring at cupboards full of crazy food you won't eat (chili tomato spaghetti anyone?) or hunting for a lid for 15 min before you realize that there is no damn lid.

So being an action sort of girl I'll take the food bull by the horns and go a couple of rounds. Surely I can figure this out- organize, cook, lose a bit of weight. 

Can't be that hard.

Can it?

Nope, don't tell me. I don't wanna 

hear it."

So crazy met action on the corner of winter blues and man it was a doozy. She wants me to tell her something then she doesn't. Makes no sense.  So this is how I responded to Crazy. 

"Hey crazy.  You are an action girl?  True dat. You are a doer for surer. When you have a list of things to get done I know you get bat ass crazy about the list. BUT you get it done! Me on the other hand... I'm a little bit of the fizzer outer sort. You know! I like to plan and then let someone else make things happen! 

So- first off  I am totally proud of you!! I know it is hard to fit in this time FOR you. And you are tracking your progress and letting us hold you accountable. Run for your life my friend. Even if you are allergic to it!

But here is my truth- I want to hibernate. Remember last year - when all you wanted to do was sit on the couch and read?!? And in between that you were praying for snow days?!? That's where I am - no meal plans, organization tactics or plans to be a better me. Why the hell can't we get on the same cycle?!?! I mean it would make our lives easier.  

So go on with your bad self and organize and cook healthy and eeks... RUN!!! I'll be over here watching Netflix. 

The truth is I like you no matter what. With your disorganized pantry and chile tomato pasta, and 5 bottles of mustard. Do you even like mustard? 

And I don't care if you can run a marathon. Your heart is still just as good to me...but if you are ready then I am ready to be your biggest supporter. To some degree... I can't not promise that there won't be a side way glance or better yet a signature eye roll. 

Go get your doing on, Crazy!  Because spring is coming and your hammock is waiting!"

Just like my crazed action friend - we are bobbing and weaving through our days. We make mistakes. We succeed. We try new things.  And we stop old things. We get excited. We get disappointed. We get crazy.   We fizz out only to want to bite off more than we can chew like my crazy friend. 

The truth is whatever you have your eye on to do. Do it. And when you mess up - own it!

Just start again...seriously because when the hammock is swinging and springtime is on the brink I want to be ready! Ready for that first whiff of fresh cut grass and the baby buds on the tree. 

Don't apologize for your crazy. It's really only an amped up version of enthusiasm. 

No glory. Just guts

So I have this on going banter with one of my favorites about guts. You know what I mean, right? Do you have the guts to say what you mean? Or how about the guts to say, 'No, not today!'  Or the guts to say what you need and not be ashamed of it? Or how about this one: what does your gut instinct tell you?!!

Grab a drink of your choice-Or a glass of vino... Or a carafe. No judging here. 

This was a dialogue between friends in the height of the holiday hustle and bustle. And in my quest to be okay with who I am in the upcoming year- I am challenging myself not to over do ANYTHING-the timing was perfect to share some gutsy adult talk. 

"Hi! I see you. No really, I see what you're doing. Lemme tell you something.

Wait. Hold Up. Let me not tell you something.

Aren't you tired of being told what to do every day? Bombarded by advice from FB, Twitter, Pinterest, and on and on. Photoshop has ruined reality for most of us- to a point where if our Elf on the Shelf isn't being creative, then what kind of mother are we?  Or if your body isn't beach-ready then do you really deserve a vacation? What do you mean you forgot it was Ugly Sweater Day at school? Don't you read the newsletter? I can't believe you even made it out the door today. In our 'real' world.

I'm tired of it all. I can not take another single piece of advice. Please don't tell me what to wear or what not to say or how to dress my family for my cutesy fall pics for the Christmas cards that I have to mail this weekend. If I see another recipe for fudge or another 3 point schedule for squats, I will lose it!

Unless it's Grandma: then I might listen. Or you. I might throw you a side eye, but you are usually pretty right. Damn it. 

Why is that? What price are we setting on this unsolicited advice? Why can't we listen to our gut instinct anymore? I think it's because we can never find a still, small place to listen to ourselves. And that's super sad cause I'd like to think of myself as pretty smart. But even then I'm not listening to me. I'm too wrapped up in the "I should's to even pay any attention to the  "I have to's. 

We have lost our relationships with our guts. Probably somewhere between the juice fasting and the liver detoxing and the preparing freezer meals, would be my guess. Or the crafts and the decor and the homeschool curriculumn. 

Somewhere along that super long road, is our gut. Sitting with it's tiny suitcase wondering where the hell we are and when the hell are we coming back.

Go find yourself. She's lost and needs you. I have no idea how, don't even ask. I'm going to be off somewhere, backtracking on my road, eyes peeled for myself."

And then it was countered with this:

"Yes!  I hear you. Loud and clear.  But why do you love my rotten, bloated guts and not your own!?!?

They are just as awesome. You have enough guts. You are enough! 

I have a confession though... I may or may not be one of those moms doing all the stuff and seeing what every one else is doing... You know that cause I text you a bazillion times to say- did you see?!?!?  

My guts aren't original. I have all good intentions of doing my own things. But fear and shame shake my guts and say better stick to the plan. 

I guess just like you don't like to listen to your guts. I don't like to listen to my own ideas for fear that they aren't worthy or good enough. Why is that?!?!?  

Here is the deal- you need to listen to your guts  and I need to be brave and show my guts! 

In order to do that... 

You must be still!

I must be still. 

Listen to your heartbeat and the sound of your breathing and realize that you are enough! 

Our guts are so amazing, all by itself.  God gave us these guts- scared, jealous, brave, torn, cleansed, bloated whatever our guts look and feels like they are ours.  Authentic. No more denying our guts.  

So love your messy guts. I do! Be brave and take that next right step. Be still. And listen to your guts. They have a story to

tell. It's your story. Xo "

And with that I am out. Happy hump day. Love your guts. Listen to them.